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Jun
13th

Don’t touch!

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The world is coming apart at the seams and in order to make us all feel better and think of the old days, car manufacturers are reviving old nameplates. The correlation here may not be that obvious, but we humans like to ignore reality and think of cute fluffy bunnies, but I digress...

I love the idea of reviving old nameplates but there is a line that must not be crossed although it has already been battered, murdered and disfigured. A GTO should have remained a GTO but the Pontiac Sunfire GTO killed the GTO... There are tons of examples like this one and I say that the time is now to put a STOP to it.

GM, the champions at dismembering classic venerable names, are thinking about going at it again. It was recently found out that they had reapplied late last May at the US Patent and Trademark Office for the GNX and Grand National nameplates. “Yay!” for many reasons and “don't!” for many more.

1987 Buick Regal GNX Coupe front 3/4 view
1987 Buick Regal GNX Coupe (Photo: General Motors)

It's OK, well I guess it is now, that SS, GS, GTO, and a few other legendary crests that used to make us dream have been diluted, but I must ask GM to seriously think about what it is they plan to do with GNX and Grand National.

These cars were more than visceral performance Q-Ships; they were mysterious, secretive, elusive even on top of being balls-out performance coupes. These holy letters are NOT to be slapped on an AWD four-door Buick Regal. I'll allow for the Regal GS but not this.

Think about the damage these decisions have done to Chrysler's R/T and to GM's own SS. A Dodge Caliber R/T? A Chevrolet HHR SS? Really? No dice.

I beg and plead with GM to not crush another nomenclature that raises memories of burn-outs, donuts and 1,000-hp-massive-twin-turbochargers-sticking-out-of-the-hood good times. Build it on a different platform, like the Camaro's for example, not the Regal's...

When I turn 60, I want to have memories of cool cars like my father. I'll have SRT (without exception, really), Z06, SVT and if I look to the Germans, GTI, AMG and M cars. I'm convinced that the Germans will never slap any of those letters on cars that are not deemed worthy.

Oh, and GM, don't touch Syclone or Typhoon either. That is, unless you do it right. I'm warning you! Call me if you need advice.
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