Auto News 5

Of course I have a huge affinity for the retiring, but hardly shy, Bob Lutz. The title of this column is Vile Gossip, after all, and half the things that come from my mouth at any given moment set my own hair on fire. Obviously, I like anyone - especially in this barren industry, bereft as it is of real characters - who can cause a bigger ruckus than I can.

December 2007: I get a call from a casting guy in Los Angeles. Top Gear, the most awesome automotive TV show ever made, is coming to the United States - again. They want to talk to me. I pack my bags for L.A. quicker than you can jam a star into a reasonably priced car.

It seems only yesterday they were the masters of the universe. Yet just yesterday, literally, my friends at Citibank fired an e-mail my way, inviting me to take advantage of exclusive "access to great concerts, dining, sporting events, and more." Translation: the bank won't loan money to me or anyone else, by rights it is bankrupt, yet when it's not busy jacking up credit card interest rates to usurious heights or lobbying for more bailout money, Citi makes time to suggest expensive ticket purchases for selected events that valued idiots - I mean, customers like me - might care to see, such as Kevin Nealon in the round (Citi's suggestion). All so I can pay them an additional charge.

The Miata turns twenty this year, and from the looks of its cartoonish face, it's never been happier. The front fascia's wide-eyed smile isn't the only smirk you'll be seeing, though, as the diminutive roadster has been tweaked to deliver even more fun behind the wheel.